Mad about (Cafe) Madrid

Restaurant: Cafe Madrid, Conway and Curry Ford, Orlando

Companion(s): Jasmine

Driving down Curry Ford Road in Orlando, you see lots of little restaurants and hole in the wall places, many of them Spanish (linguistically, in reality it's mostly Cuban, and Puerto Rican, with some Mexican and other Spanish speaking countries thrown into the mix for fun). Cafe Madrid is just another one of those unremarkable little hole in the wall (or storefront in the shopping center) little places, and quite frankly it isn't that remarkable when you walk in either. It's clean, sparsely decorated, and wholly average in appearance. It would make a good spy (if restaurants could conduct espionage) because it just blends in so well. Jasmine is a foodie and has lived in Orlando most of her life. She has family in the Conway area who have been there for years, and currently lives in the area herself. Yet in all of the years she has been driving past, she has never bothered to go in, despite the fact she says it has always looked busy.

This however is where average ends and "Oh my Buddha" (Oh my Me?) begins. The smells wafting from the kitchen hit me like the freight train from Inception, knocking me into another reality, and a very tasty one at that. The service is very attentive, but the reason to go to any restaurant should be the food, and Cafe Madrid's food is almost as good as getting ole'd. They feature a mix of Cuban, Spanish, and Basque cuisine, and no matter how you translate it, it comes out to "Muy Bueno."

Jasmine ordered the grouper special, which came with the garlic shrimp entree off of the menu. I got to try a couple of bites and really wish I had ordered it... it would have maybe made my top 10 meals of all time list. That is not to say that my meal was lacking, however. Seeing Pernil on the menu made me want to eat (like a) pig, so I ordered it and did exactly that. Quite succulent and tasty.

Every entree comes with salad (the house dressing rocks my socks), rice (great yellow rice... why waste your time with white rice in a spanish restaurant unless you are pouring your black beans over it) and of course the just mentioned black beans. Holy frijoles, Batman. These are some seriously bad ass black beans... some of the best I've ever had, and worth the trip by themselves. And if these aren't enough, you also get your choice of tostones or maduros. I can't comment on the Tostones, because we both love Maduros, and these were quite good. Some really great cuban bread was also brought to the table.

Jasmine ordered Sangria, and after having a sip of hers, I had to order one too. Again, some of the best I've ever had. Not terribly strong, but the flavor was superb! I really wish I had had room for dessert, but there was easily enough food left over from both of our plates for lunch the next day, so you can bet there was no room left in even my big belly for some dulces.

So how much would you pay? Most of the entrees were in the $9-11 range... no mierda! Jasmine's special was $20, but worth every penny, and seafood isn't cheap.

Were I grading it like a school teacher, I'd consider giving it a si (which translates to "A" in my book... and that's a Fonzie kind of "Aaaaaaa!" not a Canadian "Eh", just to clarify. Since I rate everything on a different scale (and not the ones from Jasmine's fish) however, I'm giving it 9 big chunks of fruit in my sangria.

Deck the plates with Brats and Sauerkraut, Ya, Yalaha! Ha! La-la-la la...

Restaurant: Yalaha Country Bakery, Yalaha, FL

Companion(s): The Black Belt Chef

So this is Christmas, and I'm on a quest (to paraphrase John Lennon)... not a difficult one mind you, but a quest just the same... one frought with the perrils of the highway (complete with Biker gangs and bad traffic, but more on them later). Like I said it's Christmas, and The Buddha needs a Stollen (not talking about the rise in crime at the holidays, either). When you mention Christmas Fruitcake, most folks go "Blech!", but Stollen, dear readers, is the real deal, the often imitated fruitcake traditionally served at Christmastime, and probably the unfortunate inspiration for that most dreaded of holiday gifts, mass produced by wanna-be bakeries trying to make a quick buck by selling you something better suited to be stuck on the front of a building than stuck in your face. Now if you go find a "genuine Stollen" at Publix, you might not be impressed (I wasn't), but fortunately for us there is a German Style Bakery, run by a German baker, who makes them (and lots of other tasty Euro-treats) in the tiny hamlet of Yalaha, Florida. Hamlet is an overstatement, as this town is so small it barely qualifies as a bite, much less a whole ham-let. For those of you without a PhD in Florida Geography, it's about 45 minutes North of Orlando near Howie-in-the-Hills, in Lake County. Where?!?! Don't panic, just click the link at the top of this page for their website, then follow the maps on their page.

So I put out the call to a couple of foodie friends, and the Black Belt Chef was up for the trip. Having a black belt along when there are biker gangs involved is always a plus... "Ever meet a Ninja in a bar? It's a lot of fun!" So what's with all the Biker gangs, you ask? County roads 19 and 48 in Lake County are a beautiful, curvy, relatively untraveled pair of byways, perfect for motorcycle cruising. When the Chef and I pull in, there are 10 bikes in the parking lot, and as we walk up to the bakery another 20 or so pull in together (not to mention about 30 cars). Fortunately, the bikers here are generally the friendly sort, just weary travelers like ourselves, looking to get their grub on, German style.

The bakery is ALWAYS packed on the weekends... get there early, and take a number folks. So Chef and I wait, load up the car with pastries and bread (and a stollen), and then wander back inside to hit the Deli for lunch. Deli? WTF? I thought you said bakery! Well, with all of this good bread, you've got to have some meat to put on it, right?

The building also houses a deli, which ships in all of ther meats from Geier's Sausage Kitchen in Sarasota (the subject of a future quest/blog... suffice to say it totally rocks and is worth the drive). However on the weekends, besides sandwiches, they have specials, which brings me to the true subject of this post... The Saturday special was Bratwurst (choice of smoked or not), Sauerkraut, German Style potato salad (not the over-vinegared crap some folks pass off as German style potato salad here in the South, either) and a Pretzel. The kraut is perhaps the best I've ever had, resplendent with bay leaves and juniper berries (which you pick out), and the potato salad, served warm, is amazing. As it was a nice day, we chose to sit outside and listen to the "band" play a mix of classic rock and Christmas carols... bizarre, but it somehow worked. I might have just been overly hungry, but this may have to make my list of Best Meals Ever (and at $7.95 is certainly the cheapest of them). It should be noted that the crowds are thick during the weekends, and this is not someplace to visit if you are in a hurry. The service at the counter is friendly and helpful, but moves at the speed of an inebriated gastropod, motivating vertically upon a raised land mass. The food however is definitely worth the wait in line.

Having had our fill of good German cuisine, we moved on to Lake county's other well known foodie destination, Lakeridge Winery. The tour is informative and not too long, but a little sales pitchy. However I'm quite willing to sit through a sales pitch for some free wine. :) Here's a hint... if there is something not in the tasting that you really want to try, they'll hook you up at the "bar" in the gift shop. The Pink Crescendo (a methode champagnoise sparkling wine is quite tasty, though pricey. The surprising find is the Cream Sherry from the San Sebastian winery, their sister winery in St. Augustine. The Chef was quite thrilled with it, and I added this stop to our itinerary specifically to pick up a bottle of it for myself for the holidays.

Overall I give it 8 Juniper berries in a truly amazing mound of sauerkraut.

Good Thai in da house.

Restaurant: Thai House, Colonial Drive, near Bumby, Orlando, Fl

Companion(s): The Culinary Ninja

With The Princess out of town on business for the week, I've been fortunate to go on some culinary adventures with friends, to some places she isn't adventurous enough to try.  I haven't had Asian in a while, so I talked my good friend the Culinary Ninja, (who is a former chef, blackbelt in the dojo and in the kitchen) into joining me east of Downtown for dinner at the Thai House.  The building is kind of like a good oriental dumpling... rather ordinary on the outside, but inside, yummy!  Very nicely decorated, the ambiance sets the mood for the meal to follow.

We started off with some soup.  Tom Yum for the Ninja, and Tom Kha for me.  Tom Yum is one of my favorite Asian soups, with chicken, galangal (similar in appearance, but not flavor to ginger), mushrooms, lemongrass, celery, onion, red bell pepper, bamboo shoots, cilantro and lime juice in coconut milk.  The version here is outstanding, with the vegetables being at just the right level of doneness, and a perfect blend of citrus, and cilantro, smoothed out by the coconut milk.  Tom Yum is a spicy version of Tom Kha, minus the galangal, which is a key ingredient of Tom Kha (Kha being the Thai pronunciation for the ingredient).  CN really liked it, saying...

We also decided to split an order of dumplings, and like I said, humble on the outside but inside, quite yummy.  The dumplings themselves had a mild, pleasant flavor.  The ginger soy sauce they came with however really made the dish.  

For dinner I had Phad Thai, the Thai national noodle dish.  It consists of rice noodles, bean sprouts, paprika, other seasonings, and is slightly sweet.  This was an average version, without the depth of flavor of other Phad Thai I've tried.  The portion here was adequate, but not as large as some other Thai restaurants in the area.  On the bright side that left room for dessert!

CN opted for the fried cheesecake, which he described as fair.  He was expecting more.  I decided to be adventurous and go for the Mango and Sticky Rice, having no idea what to expect.  What I  got was a bed of sticky rice toped with a sliced mango section, coconut syrup, and toasted sesame seeds.  The rice was, well, sticky rice, and the mango wasn't as sweet as it should have been.  The coconut syrup, however, saved the dish, bringing the needed sweetness expected in a dessert, and the nuttiness of the toasted sesame seeds was subtle but there.  A sweeter mango and a few more sesame seeds would have made this an absolute hit, but as it was it didn't live up to what I was hoping for.

The atmosphere is nice, the food good and not overpriced, and while I've had better Thai in Orlando, I've also had much worse.  I recommend checking out the restaurant's website, as it is well done, including Thai dining etiquette tips, and an outstanding online menu with photos!  Even though there were only 6 dumplings on the plate, I'll give it 7 1/2 dumplings dipped in ginger soy sauce.  Yum!

It takes four tu Tango...

Restaurant:  Cafe Tu Tu Tango, International Drive, South of Kirkman, Orlando Florida.

Companion(s):  Mr. Dark, The Princess of Wands, The Captain

... And while the four of us could have probably tangoed just fine, since three of us were straight guys, that probably would not have worked out so well.  In the words of Chrissie Hynde, don't get me wrong.  I have no problem with two guys tangoing, if that's their thing, but in our case it would have been a recipe for awkward.  Thankfully we were there for the food and drinks.  The dancing that evening would instead be provided by a belly dancing trio, but more on that later.

If you have never been to Tango's it's really worth the trip just for the experience.  The food is Tapas style (appetizer portions meant for sharing), and they also have a full liquor bar, with a great beer and wine selection as well.  The establishment is part bar, part restaurant, part art gallery, and part performance space.  Original art adorns the walls, all of which is for sale.  There are numerous artists in residence there who sit and do their work while you eat.  The next time you come visit, you just might see what they were working on hanging on the restaurant walls.  Thankfully, the spray can artist was outside. :)  In addition to the painters, etc. Tango's is also home to a number of performing artists.  Who is performing on a given evening is subject to chance, and a rotating schedule.  This particular evening featured the aforementioned trio of Belly Dancers, who while talented, were on too long, and their music was too loud.  Frankly, so was the Cafe's background music, so I don't hold that against them. Maybe the manager has been to one too many Who concerts.  The other featured entertainment for the evening included a fortune teller doing Palm and Tarot Card readings, and a strolling magician.  While none of us got our fortunes told, we did invite the magician, who's name was Alex, over for a visit.  We enjoyed his act, especially the card flourishes, but felt he took himself too seriously, and it hurt the entertainment value.

In addition to tables, there is a bar if you prefer (where you can order anything on the menu) and also some couches in the middle, for hanging out with friends.  We opted for a couple of the couches and settled in for an evening of not so quiet conversation, good drinks, and tasty treats.  I should mention that we were sitting under an air conditioning duct that had a tendency to drip, probably from the ice cold air blowing through it and the brutal Florida humidity.  Still, that's no excuse for Chinese Water Torture.  

I wasn't in a wine kind of mood that night, so I opted for a corona (I almost went for the Framboise, but $12 is a bit on the steep side, even for framboise, but such is life when you are on I-Drive).  My companions however are all oenophiles, and were all too happy to delve in to the Cafe's ample wine list.  The Princess of Wands seemed quite happy with her Rosemount Estates Shiraz, fro Australia, and spoke highly of it's tannic, long finish.  She commented it went especially well with the Barcelona Seafood stir-fry, discussed below.  Mr. Dark and The Captain opted for the Riscal Tempranillo, from Spain.  Mr. Dark liked it's smokey notes but was unimpressed overall, while The Captain  had a far more descriptive review... "A defensive tackle has nailed me with a sack full of tannins for the entry.  As I'm recovering a dump truck full of tannins lands on me, and as I crawl out from under that pile, I experience a dry, somewhat thin finish.  At least it's not floral".  Well said, Captain.

As mentioned before Tango's menu is served Tapas style (That's tapas, not topless, for those of you with screen reader software).  We started off with a Barcelona Stir-fry, which consisted of shrimp, chicken, Andouille Sausage, mushrooms, red peppers, and garlic over rice.  Though the chicken was dry, the calamari was tender, the shrimp was tasty (someone commented that it would have been better grilled and added late in the preparation process) and the rice was failry well done.  The dish reminded me a bit of Pallela, without the mollusks.  Hence the Barcelona, I suppose.  The Princess asked for extra peppers, but for some strange reason got extra mushrooms, which the server told us she ordered for us instead.  Maybe on her off night she is one of the psychics, though not a good one.  We might not be at Burger King, but we should still be able to get it our way, instead of the server's.  She did however bring us an extra dish of red peppers, which we happily added to the dish and devoured.  At least she was attentive.  The evening was more about the company than the food, so we didn't order much, but we did decide to try one of the desserts at the end.  After some discussion we agreed on the Trio of Tarts.  When I first saw it on the menu, I wondered if it referred to the belly dancers.  Instead what we received was three miniature pies, Guava, Key Lime, and Coconut Cream, which we quartered and shared around.  The crusts were a little too thick and ordinary for my taste, and slightly overpowered the fillings.  The coconut cream was by far the best of the three in everyone's opinion.  The key lime was disappointingly average for a Florida chain (at least it wasn't green) and the guava was just kind of there.

I've been a long time fan of Cafe Tu Tu Tango.  There are times I have been in and would come really close to giving it a 9.  Comparing price to quality and portion size, however I just justify that high a score.  I don't mind paying for great food, but the food isn't "I'd pay anything for it" good (which is not to say it's bad).  Factor in the psychic server, the dry chicken, the loud music, the water torture and the average dessert, and I just can't give it the 8 I had hoped to this visit, either.  Mr. Dark and The Princess of Wands gave it a 7, The Captain gave it a 5 to be kind.  I hope that what we experienced was just an off night.  I do recommend visiting Cafe Tu Tu Tango's, but my reviews are based on my experience ON THAT VISIT.  That being said I give it 6 tarts, three on the dance floor, and three on my plate.

Mr. Fudd responds

A Food Buddha follow-up:

OK kids, about week ago I panned my recent trip to Fuddrucker's and true to my word e-mailed (well actually web page comment form-ed) their corporate HQ with the contents there-in.  They responded by forwarding my comments to the Orlando Franchise owner who emailed me as well.  Out of a sense of fair play, I have included his email to me, names and phone numbers omitted of course to protect his privacy.  My response to him follows that, for your reading pleasure.  I sincerely accept and appreciate his apology, as well as his offer of a free meal to make up for it.  However I stand by my reasons below.

Dear Mr Buddha....

Firstly I would like to apologize for your visit to my store. It hurts me to think that I was having that off of a night, that I was not seeing everything that you saw and that effected your visit. If you have anymore information regarding your visit, please share it with me, and also I would like to invite you to come back to the resturant, on us of course.

Again please accept my apologizes for not meeting the standard that evening.


Pleae feel free to contact me at (number omitted) or via email also.


Thank you for your time,
(Name omitted)

Fuddruckers Festival Bay

Dear Mr. (name omitted),

      Thank you for your response.  As I said in my blog, I understand that things get busy and condiments run out, but what I saw was excessive.  Much of what I noticed could be easily fixed by having your employees make more regular checks of the condiment stations, rest rooms, etc. and not waiting until they are completely empty to refill them.  I admit I have no clue what your operational realities were that evening.  Maybe you were short on staff, maybe I came in after 4 cheerleading teams had just left.  The one thing that I do know is that there was no one on the floor doing checks.  That is painfully obvious from the VAST number of shortages we saw, both in terms of consumables on the floor and the women's rest room (I reiterate NO Toilet paper, paper towels, OR soap in ANY stall or dispenser).  The backwards burger patties was just icing on the cake (or maybe ketchup on the fries).  Could be a mistake, could be lack of training or procedures.

     While I do accept your apology, and as I know what a Fuddrucker's experience is SUPPOSED to be like, you can rest assured I will be back.  However if you want to make it right, a free meal isn't what I'm looking for.  It is my hope instead that you will fix the problems I found with your restaurant, train your managers, train your staff, and make sure the management team is out on the floor leading from the front instead of sitting in the back giving orders and hoping the restroom are clean. 

     Please realize that my turning down your offer of a free meal is not an intended as an affront, or out of any sense of disdain for your restaurant.  Rather it is out of a sense of both personal and journalistic integrity, and integrity is sorely lacking in this day and age.  Few things annoy me more as both a diner and former service industry worker than some a-hole causing a scene or complaining about something just to try and scam a free dessert or meal.  The purpose of my blog (though new still small) is to encourage a high standard in the restaurant industry, and to turn people on to restaurants that are truly exceptional (the 8's 9's and 10's) in the very selfish hope that the will be successful and remain open, so I can continue to enjoy dining there with my family and friends

Rest assured that upon my next visit if I find anything unreasonably amiss, I will ask for you by name. 

Wishing you much success in your future endeavors, I remain respectfully,

The Food Buddha 

Happy dining dear readers.  May your dinner be cooked to your liking.

Austin's - Coffee, Chow, and Comedy in Winter (no where to) Park

Restaurant: Austin's Coffee, Fairbanks Ave., Winter Park, FL

Companion(s): Mr. Dark, The Princess of Wands, & Puck

It's 10:30 on a Sunday night, and by all that is logical and sane I should be in bed.  However, I'm flying solo, the cat's aren't feeling conversational, and my friends Mr. Dark, The Princess of Wands, and Puck are tempting me with an offer I can't refuse: Food, drink and conversation at a quaint Winter Park coffee house called Austin's, which though I've driven by it many times, I've never stopped in to visit.  So instead of turning in, I'm turning around on a side street looking for someplace to park.  It turns out you can sneak between Austin's and the building to the West and there's a good sized parking lot hidden out back, overlooking the famous sinkhole.  I can dig it.  Good thing about the parking lot, too.  This place is packed like a carry-on suitcase after the checked baggage surcharge goes into effect.

There's a wanna-be comic on a little stage near the front, strumming his guitar and telling mostly bad jokes... actually I liked what he was going for with the intellectual style humor, but the guitar added nothing but noise (well maybe a little coffee house vibe... I can dig it) and his timing and his act reminded me of a fake Rolex from Canal street in New York...  Looks good, holds up for a few minutes, then falls apart.  But even a broken Fauxlex is right on twice a day, and this cat did make me laugh once or twice.  At least it was something to listen to while we waited in line for a beverage, since we couldn't hear each other.   

Plenty of sweets and munchies on the menu, as well as reasonably priced drinks.  Even a selection of vegetarian and Vegan fare.  While my friends initially just ordered drinks, I couldn't pass up the single remaining slice of cheesecake in the case.  Light, creamy, decadent, with chocolate drizzle.  Add to that a Boylan's sugar cane juice sweetened root beer (also quite tasty) and I was on my way to sugar heaven, badly needed to counteract the effects of loud comic hell.  The Princess of Wands & Mr. Dark went for the house Cabernet, made from organically grown grapes and later in the evening The Princess of Wands went back for a Grilled Chicken wrap with pasta salad.  One of the things she told me she loves about Austin's is the reasonably priced drinks, and the Merlot was surprisingly complex for $5.00 a glass.  The wrap itself got high marks (even for the wrapper which looked more like pita than wrap), however the pasta salad she described as tasteless (kind of like the closing comic's act).   Puck just ordered a micro-brewed Oatmeal Stout... the name escapes me, as none of us realized we were going to review the place until near the end of the evening when I realized someone besides myself had ordered food.    We found a couple of comfy chairs in the back (as far away from the ruckus as possible) and killed a couple of hours catching up and talking shop.

They have entertainment most nights, so if you are looking for reasonable eats and a free show (remember you get what you pay for) this might be a good shot.  Check their website for the schedule.  I would prefer the place quieter, and will have to return during the day to try more of the food, when I can actually hear what my friends are saying.  Eventually I'll go back and give the food a more thorough review, but as there was more entertainment than food this particular outing, perhaps I should rate it with applause.  I give it 6 (one handed) claps.

Fudd's is a dud

Restaurant: Fuddrucker's - Festival Bay, International Drive, Orlando, FL

Companion(s):  The Princess

You may think that my opening string of average to great reviews makes me a pushover of a food critic.  If you think I'm sitting on the fence, or maybe just trying to be nice, read on at your own peril.  To quote Alan Parsons, sitting on fences can make you a pain in the @$$.  I have high standards, and to get high marks (8+) you have to really impress me.  To get a 10, you have to blow me away.  I call them like I see them, and my recent visit to Fuddrucker's Thursday, July 3, 2008 left me seeing red.

Fuddrucker's bills itself at the world's greatest hamburgers. I don't know if I'd go that far, but is usually a safe bet for a good burger.  Not so on my recent visit there with The Princess.  

She got a cheddar cheese burger, medium, I got the Bacon Cheddar Special, medium well.  Two fries, two drinks.  This should have been a no-brainer.  Everything was great until after I ordered.  This was around 9:00.  They were still open for at least another hour, and folks were coming in after us.  We went for drinks while our food cooked, only to find no ice in either soda machine.  One machine out, no biggie.  Even two out, no biggie.  Sometimes things get busy and stuff gets missed.  I can accept that.  4 minutes later, somebody showed up with some ice.  I went for the sweet tea, they were out.  When I went to the counter for our food,  my burger had two of the skimpiest pieces of bacon I've ever seen on it.  Limp, not crispy.  I headed to the sauce bar, and 5 of 8 sauce dispensers was empty (one katsup, yellow mustard, and (I think) BBQ sauce were left, no spicy mustard, no mayo.  After waiting 3-4 minutes, seeing no one even to ask, and with several other customers standing around obviously annoyed, I gave up and settled for yellow mustard.  One of two cheese dispensers was almost empty (the cheese trickled out like molasses on a cold morning).  At least they had pickle slices.  So I sat down and bit into my burger and it was much pinker than I was expecting, while the Princess's was bordering on well done (I'm referring to the cooking  temperature, certainly not quality).  They got the patties backwards.  "Well, it looks like the Food Buddha is about to write his first bad review", I said to her.  After a post dinner visit to the lady's room she agreed... No toilet paper, no soap, no paper towels.  

Come on people, WTF?!?!? Can you say health code violation?  I have to blame management.  Maybe when I email this to corporate, they will take action.  One thing is for sure anything would be an improvement.  I expect better than this from Fuddrucker's and have often expereinced it, but after this visit, it will be a while before I go back.  Especially at those prices.  Sonic is across the street, their burgers are great, and their prices and drinks are better.  At least Fuddrucker's got the seasoned fries right, even if there were fewer of them than usual.  I give it two puny strips of bacon, of a possible ten.