The Food Buddha's Big Belly Blog

Art's BBQ... edible, but not art.

2011-04-16T23:30:00.000-04:00

Restaurant: Art's Bar-B-Q Altamonte Springs, FL, Near Crane's Roost Park

Companions: The Old Master, Jasmine

OK, so it's the Old Master's Birthday, and besides Mexican food, he Loves Bar-B-Q. Quite the 'Cue connoisseur, when he tells me he has found the best 'Cue since he has been in Florida, I'm definitely intrigued. In my mind, as my regular readers know, not much can beat Keller's (see the previous post). So Jasmine and I head on up to Altamonte Springs, to spend some time with him, celebrate his 77th birthday, and hope to be impressed. Well, Y'all (in my best southern, 'cue lovin', rib munchin' accent) we ain't. Maybe it was just the hype, or maybe I'm spoiled, but Keller's has this place beat by a mile. Don't get me wrong, they did do some things well, but there were a few places where they just fell flatter than a frog on I-4 during rush hour.

Tips on foursquare warned us that the service was slow, and the people were rude. I'm pleased to report very firendly staff, and while the food did take a bit to come out, I suspect it was because some things wree being made fresh to order (Like my fried okra). Which seemed like it was commercially breaded, but better than most non-homemade I have had and seemed fresh out of the frier. The baked beans totally rocked. Great and unusual flavor. picked peppers or something in them, great sauce. Probably the best thing I had there. The St. Louis Style Rips were tender and meaty, and the sauce was good, but NOT Keller's ribs or sauce. Both The Old Master and I had those, and he always doubles up on beans. Here, I can see why. Jasmine's Collard Greens were fair. The coleslaw was way too mayonnaisy and typical of the bad coleslaw found in most BBQ places. Her Pulled pork was well done and had a nice flavor. So far, fair and forgivable, but then they dropped the ball big time. Her sandwich should have been on a bun, but was served with white bread, as were the other dinners. I Wonder who decided to serve Wonder bread instead of Texas toast? In a BBQ restaurant you've got two bread choices... homemade/parker house/(or even Kings Hawaiian) rolls or Texas Toast. These geniuses give you white bread I wouldn't even feed the ducks down at Crane's roost Park?!?!? I lost all respect for this place when I saw that. I'm giving you an F, Art, because your choice of bread stinks. And let's face it... you're going to have sticky fingers after eating BBQ... no moist towelettes? Really? You afraid your patrons with sticky fingers are going to sticky finger a bunch of towelettes for their car or purse? Art isn't a very trusting guy, apparently. At least bring us ONE with dinner then, if you can't leave us a bucket full of them on the table.

The atmosphere was part fast food joint, themed BBQ shack, but part Memphis Blues, with pix of blues greats on the walls and blues playing in the background. The thing that really gave me the blues was the white bread and lack of towelettes. The Old Master enjoyed his Birthday dinner, though, and that is what counts I suppose.

Good meat and sauce, fair sides other than the beans (which do rock), and a fail on anything on the table that was white (coleslaw, towelettes, and bread). I'm giving Art's 7 used napkins, because I needed that many, and a trip to the washroom to clean my fingers.

I'm in Love with Lebanese

2011-02-15T10:52:00.000-05:00

Restaurant: Cedar's - Sand Lake Road, near Dr. Phillips

Companion(s): Jasmine

www.orlandocedars.com

Ok so I haven't posted in a while. I admit Jasmine has kept me rather distracted. :) Why am I boring you with all this mushy stuff? Because it's Valentine's Day (or at least it was when we went to Cedars) and my love for this restaurant is right up there with the best I've been to. Of course I love Jasmine more, but as restaurants go, this one has absolutely stolen my heart. Might have been the company, but with a name like Cedars, it's gotta have the potential for culinary wood... and I'm talking totally aroused taste buds here, not "the chicken tastes like wood" (with apologies to The Sugar Hill Gang... and if you haven't already guessed, this restaurant is an "Eater's Delight").

So Like I said, is/was Valentine's Day, and silly Buddha that I am, I decide to take Jasmine (who is Lebanese, by the way, hence the Aladdin reference) to a Lebanese restaurant. I've had Jasmine's home made Lebanese food, and it was truly amazing... all her Siti's (Arabic Grandma's) recipes. An untried restaurant on Valentine's Day has the potential for disaster. Especially when your significant other grew up eating that style of food. We've been wanting to try the restaurant for a while, though, and agreed that we would risk it. The restaurant was dimly lit and very romantic... the decor and background music made us feel like we had stepped in to another world, or at least another country. So far, so good. Our waiter was Arabic and truly knowledgable about the restaurant and the menu. He asked if we had never been there before, and when we said "No." he recommended the Special, which was a 2 person version of their "Arabic Feast for Four". It consisted of three cold appetizers, four hot appetizers, a platter of meats and veggies with portions of three of the entree meats from the menu (chef's choice), steamed rice and veggies, and a dessert.

The cold appetizers were brought out first... the hummus was remarkably creamy, some of the best I've ever had.

The baba ghanouj was wonderfully smoky, THE best I've ever had by far (and if you can disagree, you must be smoking something yourself). If I had to pick one can't miss item on the menu, it would have to be this. The tabbouleh was good but not as much bulgar as I was expecting, and a bit oily, but excelent flavor over all. This was served with fresh Syrian (pita) bread that was still warm and puffy from the oven. Truly amazing. Though we didn't get to try it, it is interesting to note Kibbeh Nayeh (Raw beef kibbeh, a lebanese delicacy) is also on the menu.

As to the hot appetizers, The safiah (meat pies) were wonderful, great flavor. Seasoned ground meat in a puff pastry. The fatayer Jasmine says sere just like her Siti's. The cheese rolls were cheese strips fried in a light crispy wanton-like wrapper. But my favorite of the hot appetizers had to be the felafel... far and away the best felafel I've ever had. They were almost like an arabic hush puppy... very light, very flavorful. All of the hot appetizers were served with a tahini sauce (which is supposed to come with the felafel) that was very good.

At this point we were bordering on full, and still had the entree to come... the entree platter (on the menu as the Mixed Grille) was huge and contained nice sized portions of three of their meat entrees. The kafta kebab was beef very well seasoned with a unique blend of spices. The shish kabab is the tenderest most flavorful lamb I've ever had in my life. Finally, the shish tawook (grilled chicken skewers) was amazing... wish I knew what kind of seasonings they used. Oh my wow good! This mammoth platter of meats was accompanied by steamed rice and vegetables - the veggies were all perfectly tender crisp, and the baby carrots exceptionally sweet.

Dessert (not that we had room for it, but we forced ourselves) was fruit, honey and whipped cream. Simple and light, which is good, as we could not have finished anything heavier. We took home enough food for us both to have VERY large lunches the next day. $50 for two is a bit pricey, but considering the quality and the fact that we four meals out of it, well worth every penny.

I've never given a reviewed restaurant a 10, as it is rare to fine a restaurant where the quality of the food, the service, the atmosphere and the price are all exceptional. However Cedar's has truly achieved culinary nirvana. This was one of the 10 best meals I've ever had in my life, so in this case I'm giving it 10 (big Buddha) bellies dancing. If you are in Orlando, don't miss Cedar's!

One final note, the post is dated from when we ate there, even though I am just now getting around to writing it up. Thank Buddha for iPhone voice memos. -FB

Mad about (Cafe) Madrid

2010-07-24T21:48:00.009-04:00

Restaurant: Cafe Madrid, Conway and Curry Ford, Orlando

Companion(s): Jasmine

Driving down Curry Ford Road in Orlando, you see lots of little restaurants and hole in the wall places, many of them Spanish (linguistically, in reality it's mostly Cuban, and Puerto Rican, with some Mexican and other Spanish speaking countries thrown into the mix for fun). Cafe Madrid is just another one of those unremarkable little hole in the wall (or storefront in the shopping center) little places, and quite frankly it isn't that remarkable when you walk in either. It's clean, sparsely decorated, and wholly average in appearance. It would make a good spy (if restaurants could conduct espionage) because it just blends in so well. Jasmine is a foodie and has lived in Orlando most of her life. She has family in the Conway area who have been there for years, and currently lives in the area herself. Yet in all of the years she has been driving past, she has never bothered to go in, despite the fact she says it has always looked busy.

This however is where average ends and "Oh my Buddha" (Oh my Me?) begins. The smells wafting from the kitchen hit me like the freight train from Inception, knocking me into another reality, and a very tasty one at that. The service is very attentive, but the reason to go to any restaurant should be the food, and Cafe Madrid's food is almost as good as getting ole'd. They feature a mix of Cuban, Spanish, and Basque cuisine, and no matter how you translate it, it comes out to "Muy Bueno."

Jasmine ordered the grouper special, which came with the garlic shrimp entree off of the menu. I got to try a couple of bites and really wish I had ordered it... it would have maybe made my top 10 meals of all time list. That is not to say that my meal was lacking, however. Seeing Pernil on the menu made me want to eat (like a) pig, so I ordered it and did exactly that. Quite succulent and tasty.

Every entree comes with salad (the house dressing rocks my socks), rice (great yellow rice... why waste your time with white rice in a spanish restaurant unless you are pouring your black beans over it) and of course the just mentioned black beans. Holy frijoles, Batman. These are some seriously bad ass black beans... some of the best I've ever had, and worth the trip by themselves. And if these aren't enough, you also get your choice of tostones or maduros. I can't comment on the Tostones, because we both love Maduros, and these were quite good. Some really great cuban bread was also brought to the table.

Jasmine ordered Sangria, and after having a sip of hers, I had to order one too. Again, some of the best I've ever had. Not terribly strong, but the flavor was superb! I really wish I had had room for dessert, but there was easily enough food left over from both of our plates for lunch the next day, so you can bet there was no room left in even my big belly for some dulces.

So how much would you pay? Most of the entrees were in the $9-11 range... no mierda! Jasmine's special was $20, but worth every penny, and seafood isn't cheap.

Were I grading it like a school teacher, I'd consider giving it a si (which translates to "A" in my book... and that's a Fonzie kind of "Aaaaaaa!" not a Canadian "Eh", just to clarify. Since I rate everything on a different scale (and not the ones from Jasmine's fish) however, I'm giving it 9 big chunks of fruit in my sangria.

Deck the plates with Brats and Sauerkraut, Ya, Yalaha! Ha! La-la-la la...

2009-12-20T14:18:00.000-05:00

Restaurant: Yalaha Country Bakery, Yalaha, FL

Companion(s): The Black Belt Chef

So this is Christmas, and I'm on a quest (to paraphrase John Lennon)... not a difficult one mind you, but a quest just the same... one frought with the perrils of the highway (complete with Biker gangs and bad traffic, but more on them later). Like I said it's Christmas, and The Buddha needs a Stollen (not talking about the rise in crime at the holidays, either). When you mention Christmas Fruitcake, most folks go "Blech!", but Stollen, dear readers, is the real deal, the often imitated fruitcake traditionally served at Christmastime, and probably the unfortunate inspiration for that most dreaded of holiday gifts, mass produced by wanna-be bakeries trying to make a quick buck by selling you something better suited to be stuck on the front of a building than stuck in your face. Now if you go find a "genuine Stollen" at Publix, you might not be impressed (I wasn't), but fortunately for us there is a German Style Bakery, run by a German baker, who makes them (and lots of other tasty Euro-treats) in the tiny hamlet of Yalaha, Florida. Hamlet is an overstatement, as this town is so small it barely qualifies as a bite, much less a whole ham-let. For those of you without a PhD in Florida Geography, it's about 45 minutes North of Orlando near Howie-in-the-Hills, in Lake County. Where?!?! Don't panic, just click the link at the top of this page for their website, then follow the maps on their page.

So I put out the call to a couple of foodie friends, and the Black Belt Chef was up for the trip. Having a black belt along when there are biker gangs involved is always a plus... "Ever meet a Ninja in a bar? It's a lot of fun!" So what's with all the Biker gangs, you ask? County roads 19 and 48 in Lake County are a beautiful, curvy, relatively untraveled pair of byways, perfect for motorcycle cruising. When the Chef and I pull in, there are 10 bikes in the parking lot, and as we walk up to the bakery another 20 or so pull in together (not to mention about 30 cars). Fortunately, the bikers here are generally the friendly sort, just weary travelers like ourselves, looking to get their grub on, German style.

The bakery is ALWAYS packed on the weekends... get there early, and take a number folks. So Chef and I wait, load up the car with pastries and bread (and a stollen), and then wander back inside to hit the Deli for lunch. Deli? WTF? I thought you said bakery! Well, with all of this good bread, you've got to have some meat to put on it, right?

The building also houses a deli, which ships in all of ther meats from Geier's Sausage Kitchen in Sarasota (the subject of a future quest/blog... suffice to say it totally rocks and is worth the drive). However on the weekends, besides sandwiches, they have specials, which brings me to the true subject of this post... The Saturday special was Bratwurst (choice of smoked or not), Sauerkraut, German Style potato salad (not the over-vinegared crap some folks pass off as German style potato salad here in the South, either) and a Pretzel. The kraut is perhaps the best I've ever had, resplendent with bay leaves and juniper berries (which you pick out), and the potato salad, served warm, is amazing. As it was a nice day, we chose to sit outside and listen to the "band" play a mix of classic rock and Christmas carols... bizarre, but it somehow worked. I might have just been overly hungry, but this may have to make my list of Best Meals Ever (and at $7.95 is certainly the cheapest of them). It should be noted that the crowds are thick during the weekends, and this is not someplace to visit if you are in a hurry. The service at the counter is friendly and helpful, but moves at the speed of an inebriated gastropod, motivating vertically upon a raised land mass. The food however is definitely worth the wait in line.

Having had our fill of good German cuisine, we moved on to Lake county's other well known foodie destination, Lakeridge Winery. The tour is informative and not too long, but a little sales pitchy. However I'm quite willing to sit through a sales pitch for some free wine. :) Here's a hint... if there is something not in the tasting that you really want to try, they'll hook you up at the "bar" in the gift shop. The Pink Crescendo (a methode champagnoise sparkling wine is quite tasty, though pricey. The surprising find is the Cream Sherry from the San Sebastian winery, their sister winery in St. Augustine. The Chef was quite thrilled with it, and I added this stop to our itinerary specifically to pick up a bottle of it for myself for the holidays.

Overall I give it 8 Juniper berries in a truly amazing mound of sauerkraut.

It takes four tu Tango...

2008-07-19T14:47:00.004-04:00

Restaurant: Cafe Tu Tu Tango, International Drive, South of Kirkman, Orlando Florida.

Companion(s): Mr. Dark, The Princess of Wands, The Captain

... And while the four of us could have probably tangoed just fine, since three of us were straight guys, that probably would not have worked out so well. In the words of Chrissie Hynde, don't get me wrong. I have no problem with two guys tangoing, if that's their thing, but in our case it would have been a recipe for awkward. Thankfully we were there for the food and drinks. The dancing that evening would instead be provided by a belly dancing trio, but more on that later.

If you have never been to Tango's it's really worth the trip just for the experience. The food is Tapas style (appetizer portions meant for sharing), and they also have a full liquor bar, with a great beer and wine selection as well. The establishment is part bar, part restaurant, part art gallery, and part performance space. Original art adorns the walls, all of which is for sale. There are numerous artists in residence there who sit and do their work while you eat. The next time you come visit, you just might see what they were working on hanging on the restaurant walls. Thankfully, the spray can artist was outside. :) In addition to the painters, etc. Tango's is also home to a number of performing artists. Who is performing on a given evening is subject to chance, and a rotating schedule. This particular evening featured the aforementioned trio of Belly Dancers, who while talented, were on too long, and their music was too loud. Frankly, so was the Cafe's background music, so I don't hold that against them. Maybe the manager has been to one too many Who concerts. The other featured entertainment for the evening included a fortune teller doing Palm and Tarot Card readings, and a strolling magician. While none of us got our fortunes told, we did invite the magician, who's name was Alex, over for a visit. We enjoyed his act, especially the card flourishes, but felt he took himself too seriously, and it hurt the entertainment value.

In addition to tables, there is a bar if you prefer (where you can order anything on the menu) and also some couches in the middle, for hanging out with friends. We opted for a couple of the couches and settled in for an evening of not so quiet conversation, good drinks, and tasty treats. I should mention that we were sitting under an air conditioning duct that had a tendency to drip, probably from the ice cold air blowing through it and the brutal Florida humidity. Still, that's no excuse for Chinese Water Torture.

I wasn't in a wine kind of mood that night, so I opted for a corona (I almost went for the Framboise, but $12 is a bit on the steep side, even for framboise, but such is life when you are on I-Drive). My companions however are all oenophiles, and were all too happy to delve in to the Cafe's ample wine list. The Princess of Wands seemed quite happy with her Rosemount Estates Shiraz, fro Australia, and spoke highly of it's tannic, long finish. She commented it went especially well with the Barcelona Seafood stir-fry, discussed below. Mr. Dark and The Captain opted for the Riscal Tempranillo, from Spain. Mr. Dark liked it's smokey notes but was unimpressed overall, while The Captain had a far more descriptive review... "A defensive tackle has nailed me with a sack full of tannins for the entry. As I'm recovering a dump truck full of tannins lands on me, and as I crawl out from under that pile, I experience a dry, somewhat thin finish. At least it's not floral". Well said, Captain.

As mentioned before Tango's menu is served Tapas style (That's tapas, not topless, for those of you with screen reader software). We started off with a Barcelona Stir-fry, which consisted of shrimp, chicken, Andouille Sausage, mushrooms, red peppers, and garlic over rice. Though the chicken was dry, the calamari was tender, the shrimp was tasty (someone commented that it would have been better grilled and added late in the preparation process) and the rice was failry well done. The dish reminded me a bit of Pallela, without the mollusks. Hence the Barcelona, I suppose. The Princess asked for extra peppers, but for some strange reason got extra mushrooms, which the server told us she ordered for us instead. Maybe on her off night she is one of the psychics, though not a good one. We might not be at Burger King, but we should still be able to get it our way, instead of the server's. She did however bring us an extra dish of red peppers, which we happily added to the dish and devoured. At least she was attentive. The evening was more about the company than the food, so we didn't order much, but we did decide to try one of the desserts at the end. After some discussion we agreed on the Trio of Tarts. When I first saw it on the menu, I wondered if it referred to the belly dancers. Instead what we received was three miniature pies, Guava, Key Lime, and Coconut Cream, which we quartered and shared around. The crusts were a little too thick and ordinary for my taste, and slightly overpowered the fillings. The coconut cream was by far the best of the three in everyone's opinion. The key lime was disappointingly average for a Florida chain (at least it wasn't green) and the guava was just kind of there.

I've been a long time fan of Cafe Tu Tu Tango. There are times I have been in and would come really close to giving it a 9. Comparing price to quality and portion size, however I just justify that high a score. I don't mind paying for great food, but the food isn't "I'd pay anything for it" good (which is not to say it's bad). Factor in the psychic server, the dry chicken, the loud music, the water torture and the average dessert, and I just can't give it the 8 I had hoped to this visit, either. Mr. Dark and The Princess of Wands gave it a 7, The Captain gave it a 5 to be kind. I hope that what we experienced was just an off night. I do recommend visiting Cafe Tu Tu Tango's, but my reviews are based on my experience ON THAT VISIT. That being said I give it 6 tarts, three on the dance floor, and three on my plate.

Mr. Fudd responds

2008-07-10T19:16:00.006-04:00

A Food Buddha follow-up:

OK kids, about week ago I panned my recent trip to Fuddrucker's and true to my word e-mailed (well actually web page comment form-ed) their corporate HQ with the contents there-in. They responded by forwarding my comments to the Orlando Franchise owner who emailed me as well. Out of a sense of fair play, I have included his email to me, names and phone numbers omitted of course to protect his privacy. My response to him follows that, for your reading pleasure. I sincerely accept and appreciate his apology, as well as his offer of a free meal to make up for it. However I stand by my reasons below.

Dear Mr Buddha....

Firstly I would like to apologize for your visit to my store. It hurts me to think that I was having that off of a night, that I was not seeing everything that you saw and that effected your visit. If you have anymore information regarding your visit, please share it with me, and also I would like to invite you to come back to the resturant, on us of course.

Again please accept my apologizes for not meeting the standard that evening.

Pleae feel free to contact me at (number omitted) or via email also.

Thank you for your time,
(Name omitted)

Fuddruckers Festival Bay

Dear Mr. (name omitted),

Thank you for your response. As I said in my blog, I understand that things get busy and condiments run out, but what I saw was excessive. Much of what I noticed could be easily fixed by having your employees make more regular checks of the condiment stations, rest rooms, etc. and not waiting until they are completely empty to refill them. I admit I have no clue what your operational realities were that evening. Maybe you were short on staff, maybe I came in after 4 cheerleading teams had just left. The one thing that I do know is that there was no one on the floor doing checks. That is painfully obvious from the VAST number of shortages we saw, both in terms of consumables on the floor and the women's rest room (I reiterate NO Toilet paper, paper towels, OR soap in ANY stall or dispenser). The backwards burger patties was just icing on the cake (or maybe ketchup on the fries). Could be a mistake, could be lack of training or procedures.

While I do accept your apology, and as I know what a Fuddrucker's experience is SUPPOSED to be like, you can rest assured I will be back. However if you want to make it right, a free meal isn't what I'm looking for. It is my hope instead that you will fix the problems I found with your restaurant, train your managers, train your staff, and make sure the management team is out on the floor leading from the front instead of sitting in the back giving orders and hoping the restroom are clean.

Please realize that my turning down your offer of a free meal is not an intended as an affront, or out of any sense of disdain for your restaurant. Rather it is out of a sense of both personal and journalistic integrity, and integrity is sorely lacking in this day and age. Few things annoy me more as both a diner and former service industry worker than some a-hole causing a scene or complaining about something just to try and scam a free dessert or meal. The purpose of my blog (though new still small) is to encourage a high standard in the restaurant industry, and to turn people on to restaurants that are truly exceptional (the 8's 9's and 10's) in the very selfish hope that the will be successful and remain open, so I can continue to enjoy dining there with my family and friends

Rest assured that upon my next visit if I find anything unreasonably amiss, I will ask for you by name.

Wishing you much success in your future endeavors, I remain respectfully,

The Food Buddha

Happy dining dear readers. May your dinner be cooked to your liking.

Austin's - Coffee, Chow, and Comedy in Winter (no where to) Park

2008-07-07T01:16:00.007-04:00

Restaurant: Austin's Coffee, Fairbanks Ave., Winter Park, FL

Companion(s): Mr. Dark, The Princess of Wands, & Puck

It's 10:30 on a Sunday night, and by all that is logical and sane I should be in bed. However, I'm flying solo, the cat's aren't feeling conversational, and my friends Mr. Dark, The Princess of Wands, and Puck are tempting me with an offer I can't refuse: Food, drink and conversation at a quaint Winter Park coffee house called Austin's, which though I've driven by it many times, I've never stopped in to visit. So instead of turning in, I'm turning around on a side street looking for someplace to park. It turns out you can sneak between Austin's and the building to the West and there's a good sized parking lot hidden out back, overlooking the famous sinkhole. I can dig it. Good thing about the parking lot, too. This place is packed like a carry-on suitcase after the checked baggage surcharge goes into effect.

There's a wanna-be comic on a little stage near the front, strumming his guitar and telling mostly bad jokes... actually I liked what he was going for with the intellectual style humor, but the guitar added nothing but noise (well maybe a little coffee house vibe... I can dig it) and his timing and his act reminded me of a fake Rolex from Canal street in New York... Looks good, holds up for a few minutes, then falls apart. But even a broken Fauxlex is right on twice a day, and this cat did make me laugh once or twice. At least it was something to listen to while we waited in line for a beverage, since we couldn't hear each other.

Plenty of sweets and munchies on the menu, as well as reasonably priced drinks. Even a selection of vegetarian and Vegan fare. While my friends initially just ordered drinks, I couldn't pass up the single remaining slice of cheesecake in the case. Light, creamy, decadent, with chocolate drizzle. Add to that a Boylan's sugar cane juice sweetened root beer (also quite tasty) and I was on my way to sugar heaven, badly needed to counteract the effects of loud comic hell. The Princess of Wands & Mr. Dark went for the house Cabernet, made from organically grown grapes and later in the evening The Princess of Wands went back for a Grilled Chicken wrap with pasta salad. One of the things she told me she loves about Austin's is the reasonably priced drinks, and the Merlot was surprisingly complex for $5.00 a glass. The wrap itself got high marks (even for the wrapper which looked more like pita than wrap), however the pasta salad she described as tasteless (kind of like the closing comic's act). Puck just ordered a micro-brewed Oatmeal Stout... the name escapes me, as none of us realized we were going to review the place until near the end of the evening when I realized someone besides myself had ordered food. We found a couple of comfy chairs in the back (as far away from the ruckus as possible) and killed a couple of hours catching up and talking shop.

They have entertainment most nights, so if you are looking for reasonable eats and a free show (remember you get what you pay for) this might be a good shot. Check their website for the schedule. I would prefer the place quieter, and will have to return during the day to try more of the food, when I can actually hear what my friends are saying. Eventually I'll go back and give the food a more thorough review, but as there was more entertainment than food this particular outing, perhaps I should rate it with applause. I give it 6 (one handed) claps.

Fudd's is a dud

2008-07-04T23:08:00.005-04:00

Restaurant: Fuddrucker's - Festival Bay, International Drive, Orlando, FL

Companion(s): The Princess

You may think that my opening string of average to great reviews makes me a pushover of a food critic. If you think I'm sitting on the fence, or maybe just trying to be nice, read on at your own peril. To quote Alan Parsons, sitting on fences can make you a pain in the @$$. I have high standards, and to get high marks (8+) you have to really impress me. To get a 10, you have to blow me away. I call them like I see them, and my recent visit to Fuddrucker's Thursday, July 3, 2008 left me seeing red.

Fuddrucker's bills itself at the world's greatest hamburgers. I don't know if I'd go that far, but is usually a safe bet for a good burger. Not so on my recent visit there with The Princess.

She got a cheddar cheese burger, medium, I got the Bacon Cheddar Special, medium well. Two fries, two drinks. This should have been a no-brainer. Everything was great until after I ordered. This was around 9:00. They were still open for at least another hour, and folks were coming in after us. We went for drinks while our food cooked, only to find no ice in either soda machine. One machine out, no biggie. Even two out, no biggie. Sometimes things get busy and stuff gets missed. I can accept that. 4 minutes later, somebody showed up with some ice. I went for the sweet tea, they were out. When I went to the counter for our food, my burger had two of the skimpiest pieces of bacon I've ever seen on it. Limp, not crispy. I headed to the sauce bar, and 5 of 8 sauce dispensers was empty (one katsup, yellow mustard, and (I think) BBQ sauce were left, no spicy mustard, no mayo. After waiting 3-4 minutes, seeing no one even to ask, and with several other customers standing around obviously annoyed, I gave up and settled for yellow mustard. One of two cheese dispensers was almost empty (the cheese trickled out like molasses on a cold morning). At least they had pickle slices. So I sat down and bit into my burger and it was much pinker than I was expecting, while the Princess's was bordering on well done (I'm referring to the cooking temperature, certainly not quality). They got the patties backwards. "Well, it looks like the Food Buddha is about to write his first bad review", I said to her. After a post dinner visit to the lady's room she agreed... No toilet paper, no soap, no paper towels.

Come on people, WTF?!?!? Can you say health code violation? I have to blame management. Maybe when I email this to corporate, they will take action. One thing is for sure anything would be an improvement. I expect better than this from Fuddrucker's and have often expereinced it, but after this visit, it will be a while before I go back. Especially at those prices. Sonic is across the street, their burgers are great, and their prices and drinks are better. At least Fuddrucker's got the seasoned fries right, even if there were fewer of them than usual. I give it two puny strips of bacon, of a possible ten.

Keller's BBQ serves up killer 'cue and fond memories for this Fat Boy

2008-07-04T21:41:00.004-04:00

Restaurant: Keller's BBQ, just South of 436 & 434, Altamonte Springs, FL.

Companion(s): The Princess

When I was younger, skinnier, and just beginning my journey down the path of culinary wisdom, my parents and I made a couple of trips down to Florida for vacation. One of my fondest memories was going to Fat Boys BBQ for ribs. My parents met and married in Central Florida, and this was one of their favorite BBQ places. When we moved here in the Late 80's I couldn't wait to get here and get my fill of Fat Boys on a regular basis. We wet a couple of times and it was tasty, but far not as good as I remembered. Is anything ever as good as when we were kids?

They say you can't go home again. Partnerships dissolve, people move on, quality changes. Chains grow, quality suffers. Two people can cook the same recipe, but with different results. I've found ribs that compare to and even beat my the Fat Boys of my childhood, and to me the mark of any BBQ restaurant is the ribs. So when the Princess said "I'm hungry for hushpuppies" I knew it was time for some killer ribs.

The Keller family were the Original founders of Fat Boys, and their children and grand children carry on the tradition, family recipes, and talent that made the original Fat Boys a Florida BBQ destination. The first time I tried the ribs I couldn't quite put my finger on what was so familiar about the ribs, despite licking them (the fingers) repeatedly. The second time I went to Keller's , I read the menu and the light bulb went on! The rib juice practically running down my arms should have been my first clue, as the first time I ate Fat Boy's as a kid, I remember having to wash my arms up to the elbow, from the juice running down them and dripping off my elbows. That's some moist and juicy meat folks. (Any any of you even considering ruining the experience by being proper and eating them with a knife and fork can just go to Sonny's, where I won't have to see you).

At Keller's, you seat yourself at your choice of cow print clothed tables. The wall murals on one side are of a BBQ shack in the marsh, with a sailboat docked nearby (bonus points for the sailboat). The other side is the interior of the same restaurant, looking out onto the marsh! (the red curtains on the windows are the tip off). subtle, well done, and a detail probably missed by most. But then smoking meat is a subtle are, and this attention to the small details is evident in the quality of the meats.

Enough background exposition... on to the meal! The Princess wanted hushpuppies, and Keller's delivers you a baker's dozen: round, crispy, and flavorful. They are small but plentiful, and perfectly cooked. Crispy on the outside, slightly sweet and moist on the inside. However amazing as they are, appetizers in this place are almost a waste of good stomach space. The dinners come with 3 (yes three) sides, and texas toast (crispy, buttery garlic bread for the uninitiated). The Princess opted for a quarter Chicken, a la carte, and my fries. The chicken is juicy, and some of the smokiest I've tasted. The fries are crinkle cut and absolute perfection in crispiness, moisture, and texture. For sides, I got the green beans, which were tasty but average, and the BBQ beans which are well done. The Texas toast is everything Texas Toast should be, thick, crispy outside, soft inside, buttery, garlicky, and some of the best I've had. Of course you already know I had the ribs. :) The thrifty will ask their server how may ribs come on a plate, and after hearing 3-4 will order something else. Fools, all of them. These are huge, meaty, smoky, and some nights I can't finish them. They can be eaten without sauce, though in this case the sauce is outstanding and contributes to the experience. (I've only found ribs in 3 places that I would say putting sauce on them is sacrilege, which makes these the 4th best ribs I've ever eaten.. maybe even 3rd best). This particular evening they were lacking some of the smoky flavor that usually makes this place what it is... maybe they had a different chef that night, however even their "not as good as usual" is better than most. Just add sauce. Speaking of which, you will find three family recipe sauces at Keller's. Their original is my favorite, a sweet, tomato based classic BBQ sauce. The mustard based sauce is one of the better I've had, and the hot lives up to it's title, with good flavor and heat. The only thing I dislike about Kellar's is the lack of side options. They give you three, but with only 5 or 6 to choose from, it's hard to mix it up. I'll bet the corn on the cob is good, but they don't let you order it as one of your choices. It is a la carte only, and not substitutable. I have never had dessert there, as I've never had room, and occasionally leave with a box of leftovers. If you leave there hungry, it's your own fault.

All in all, Keller's is a must visit Central Florida foodie destination. Great food, good service, culinarily historical, local color, and small enough that it hasn't lost it's quality due to growth. I've had enough meals there that I'm willing to consider the ribs an off night, and hopefully not the start of a downward trend (as happened with Choctaw Willy's). Lack of choices in sides keeps me from giving it a 10, and the off night keeps it from giving it the 9 I had hoped to for this visit. Instead I give it 4 ribs, 3 sides, and an order of Texas toast (That's an 8 for the mathematically challenged).

Happiness is a warm basket of chips.

2008-06-24T16:19:00.005-04:00

Restaurant: Amigo's Tex Mex, Waterford Lakes

Companion(s): The Princess

Warm puppies are great and all, but with all due respect to Charles Schulz, they won't put an end to the rumbling in my stomach... Well, maybe they would in some parts of the world, but I prefer my dogs to be of the all beef "hot" variety, with mustard and relish, or better yet chili and cheese.

When I asked the Princess what she wanted for dinner, she said "I want to go somewhere with warm chips". As you have probably figured by now, I'm not one to turn down food of the Mexican/Tex-Mex variety, so I found myself sitting beneath giant mariachi frog statues, munching warm, crispy chips with two kinds of salsa, a traditional tomato salsa, and a fiery salsa verde. The chips were happiness indeed, but sadly no horchata to wash it down (the waiter didn't even know what it was) The sign does say Tex-Mex, however, not Mexican food, so I shouldn't be surprised. They did have some other nice happy hour specials, however I chose to pass them up.

The menu has a nice selection of dishes... the only thing missing was a "build your own combination plate". The Princess always gets fajitas, so I was quite surprised when she ordered the quesadillas. However her fajitas consist of meat, cheese and tortillas, with a little sour cream, so for her quesadillas are a bonus... no waste, and the cheese is melted. She loved them and since there was one triangle left (at least before I snagged it), I can agree, they were tasty. I had "Mom's Favorite" (a combination plate with a cheese enchilada and a tamale topped with chili (not the same as a hot dog, but I'll try anything once). The cheese enchilada, along with the rice and beans were standard fare (I swear every Mexican restaurant I go to gets their beans and rice from the same from the same inter-dimensionally connected kitchen). However the tamale rocked (well, maybe reggaetoned). I hate tamales when they are almost solid massa, with just a touch of meat in them. This one was nice and meaty in the middle (like me) and topped with a decent chili. Sadly, no room for dessert.

Prompt and courteous service and fair prices make this a safe bet if you are in the Waterford area and want something of the "local chain" variety, this family owned establishment (with 5 locations in the area) is sure to please. I give it 6 1/2 bowls of warm chips... Really seven, but I couldn't help myself (crunch).

Sushi Katana not quite a cut above, but they shouldn't fall on their sword either.

2008-06-21T17:50:00.004-04:00

Restaurant: Sushi Katana, Conroy Road, near Millennia.

Companions: None

Last week I found myself attending training down near the Mall at Millennia, on a lunch break with time to kill. Any ninja will tell you that few things kill better than a good katana, so it was that I found myself strolling in to the aptly named Sushi Katana for a leisurely lunch before returning to listen to some overpaid Ph.D. speaking on how to teach adults. While her information was good, she also could stand to take her own class. Boring enough to make one briefly consider ritual sepuku.

I liked the decor-typical Japanese modern, and as I was dining alone, was greatly appreciative of the flat panel high definition TVs airing the US open playoffs, above the Itamae's (chef's) head. They had a number of tasty sounding lunch specials, and I settled for an Omakase (chef's choice) consisting of 6 pieces of nigiri sushi, and and (ever present) California roll, along with Miso soup. The miso soup was typical of what is found in American Japanese restaurants, with shiromiso (white miso), tofu, scallions and wakame (seaweed). Competently executed, but average. The sushi itself was of similar quality. Well done, but nothing spectacular. The service was attentive, friendly, and prompt, and the bill came to $12 with tax and a generous tip.

This is not a sushi bar I would drive across town to visit. However if you're in the area, and want a well done, quick, tasty sushi lunch at a price that won't kill your wallet, grab your clan of ninjas and stealthily stroll on in. I give it 6 1/2 shuriken.

Emiliano'Z does a heroic job of bringing traditional Mexican cuisine to Central Florida

2008-06-19T23:44:00.002-04:00

Restaurant: Emiliano'Z, near 436 & 434, Altamonte Springs, FL

Companion(s): The Old Master

In the shell of a building that was once a Shell's restaurant, now resides a restaurant named after a Mexican folk hero. Emiliano'Z serves up some tasty Mexican fare, in a beautiful setting with outstanding lake views. The Old Master and I ever vigilant for what passes for Mexican food in these parts, decided to have Father's Day dinner at a relatively new Mexican Restaurant in Altamonte Springs.

I was immediately impressed by the atmosphere inside, with strings of lights on the ceiling, a fountain in the middle of the restaurant, and of course those aforementioned views. However as nice as the atmosphere was, I was there for the food... I'm not the Atmosphere Buddha after all.

Drinks first... a glance through the menu didn't reveal a list of non-alcoholic drinks, but as it was a Mexican restaurant, I took a chance and asked if they had one of my favorite beverages of all time... horchata, and was pleasantly surprised to find they did! For the uninitiated horchata is (at least in Mexico) made from rice, water, cinnamon, vanilla and sugar. Strange, I know, but it is truly tasty stuff, and dairy free, though it sure doesn't taste that way. Also notable is their Tequila selection with over 40 to choose from, including several super premium Anjehos ($30 a pour in one case).

Sadly many folks think of Tequila as some vile, harsh drinkable Mexican paint thinner, only fit to be chugged rapidly with salt and lime, so why in God's name would you pay $30 for the privilege? GOOD tequila, such as a reposado or anjeho are aperitif drinks, meant t be sipped before dinner, and the complexities found in good tequila are there, like a fine scotch or good wine. I was pleasantly surprised when a gentleman with a push cart arrived and offered us a free pour (only a bohemian shoots tequila, so I refuse to call it a shot). Though the Old Master declined, I was all to happy to accept. After as he handed me a glass, I asked the server what I was drinking, as there were several bottles on the cart, and have an appreciation for distilled blue Agave liquor. I confess I was a little disappointed to learn it was The Budweiser of tequila, Jose Cuervo. But hey, free Tequila is free Tequila, though in this case the salt and lime were quite necessary.

Life is like chips and Salsa at a Mexican Restaurant... sometimes it sucks. Fortunately the only thing sucking at this point was me on the lime as I imbibed my passable paint thinner. The salsa was just how I like it, somewhat liquid, but with enough chunky consistency to not feel like I was dipping into spicy tomato soup. Nice heat, but not brutal. The chips were crisp, and had just the right amount of salt.

Both the Old Master and I ordered the mole poblano, which consists of chicken in a sauce made of chocolate and chilies among other things. Now at this point you are probably ready to call for the men in little white coats, as chocolate covered chicken sounds about as appetizing as cinnamon rice water, and the idea of a Hershey bar melted over poultry does sound pretty disgusting, but remember that chocolate is actually bitter, and there is more to it than just chocolate and chili peppers. This mole was pretty good, though a little salty. Mine is better, but it is rare to find truly spectacular mole, and this charted higher than many versions I've tried. The beans and rice that accompanied it were tasty and typical for a Mexican restaurant... thankfully the rice wasn't too dry.

As it was Father's Day, they brought the Old Master a complementary sopapilla, with chocolate and caramel drizzle. Though quite full, of course we found room. Slightly over-fried, but tasty just the same.

A little pricier than most Mexican restaurants, but you are paying for the atmosphere and the view, and for a special occasion or a good date restaurant, definitely worth it. I give the food itself 6 1/2 chips dipped in salsa, but we throw in a lime wedge, making the overall experience a 7. Viva Zapata!

Qdoba takes its Q from all of the other burrito stands out there, but does a better job than most.

2008-04-13T14:51:00.005-04:00

Restaurant: Qdoba - Lake Mary Blvd. & 17-92, Lake Mary, FL.

Companion(s): The Old Master

It seems to me that in the recent past if you wanted a decent burrito, you went to your local Hacienda de Torture Picante, ponied up your dinero and enjoyed said Burrito, sit down style in a real restaurant. If you were in a hurry, your only choice was Taco Bell. Now it seems like burritos are the new sub. Everywhere I look there is a "you call it, we make it as you follow your food down the assembly line, a la Subway" style semi-fast food burrito/Tex-Mex shop everywhere you look. I've tried most of them, some of which will find themselves written up here as they are tasty enough to warrant my repeat business. Others will not grace these "pages" as I see no reason to spend my hard earned money on them just to give them a bad review. I write these shortly after dining at an establishment, while my thoughts are as fresh as the salsa should be. As a general rule, I'm not going to blog retroactively. But I digress.

The Old Master is somewhat to blame for my love of Tex-Mex cuisine, and both he and I grew up in the southwest. So when he mentioned trying Qdoba to me, as neither of us had eaten there before, I figured it might be a worth checking out. My first impression is that is just like any other, you call it we make it burrito stand. Clean, not too busy (surprising for the dinner rush... hopefully not a bad sign, I thought to myself) and an eclectic mix of 80's music playing in the background (always a bonus in my book). The Old Master went with the Steak Burrito no rice, both types of beans (pinto and black), and hot salsa, while I went with the new shredded pork burrito, black beans, rice cheese and mild salsa. We also decided to split an order of chips and salsa (medium). All in all about what I would expect in terms of flavor and quality. The online menu mentioned a number of salsas, but while there all I was asked was, "mild, medium or hot?" with no clue what any of them were. Please to look up brand consistency in dictionary, Qdoba folks.

Overall, reasonable tasty... I'd be willing to go back, but not somewhere I'd drive out of my way for. On a scale of 1-10, (10 being best), I give it 6 Sombreros.